Relationships.

I feel like I have a lot to say about this but I'm not exactly sure where to start..

Okay let's see.. one of the biggest things that my friends have always come to talk to me about is relationships, I guess because they are one of the things that cause a lot of conflict & they just want to talk about it. I always try my best to help in whatever way I can so heres maybe some advice that I actually told a friend today..

I'm not an expert on relationships & I'm not claiming to be one so before you go & say anything, lets clarify that. If I have learned anything from my relationships in the past, its that you can't change anyone. Period. I know you might be thinking, yes I can. No. I'm sorry but you can't. Only God can change people. I'm talking about real genuine change. I believe that some people do make some progress because of someone else but they have to do it themself & they have to do with God's help. You can disagree with me if you want & thats fine but if you do agree with me then heres what else..

I thought I could change someone at one time. I don't think that I ever said well I'll change him & it'll all be okay but I thought that if I tried getting him into church & talked to him about Christ all the time that maybe things would be okay, I'd convince him not to do certain things & he'd become a christian & we'd live happily ever after. Can you believe I thought that way? Ha. Well looking back I can't. It didn't happen like that at all. We eventually broke up, mostly because we just didn't want the same things at all. Its hard to be with someone when they don't see 90% of the way you see things. Its not that I didn't like anything about him or that he was this horrible person, I just didn't want him doing some of the things he did. I wanted him to follow Jesus. I just wanted him to see things the way I did. When it comes to relationships you want a partner, not a project. That has really stuck with me because it's true. You might be thinking thats silly that I was like that & it was, but I know that theres other people out there right now thinking the exact same thing. Truth is if you don't like the way the person you're with acts, the way they do something, something they believe, then its probably best to just not be with them.

Second thing.. one of the BIGGEST things I see, & trust me I am guilty of this myself, is the whole controlling thing. It kinda goes a long with changing somone but not exactly. SO back to this guy that I tried to change. Not only did I want to change some things about him, I didn't like all the girls he talked to. I know you know what I mean. You get upset, jealous because your boyfriend is talking to this girl & you really don't want him talking to her, or guys you don't want your girl talking to these guys so you tell them to stop & maybe they do & maybe they don't. I think its safe to say though that you shouldn't have to ask them to stop. You shouldn't have to feel like they're doing something wrong behind your back. One of the things I learned is that they are going to do it no matter what, whether you tell them or not. I know it seems like simple truth but I just didn't get it. I got too caught up in how I felt about him to see what was infront of me. If a guy/girl really wants to be with you then other girls/guys don't matter. People don't just stop doing something because you tell them to, they have to realize its wrong & it doesn't hurt to tell them you don't like it but if they don't or it seems like they just said they'd do it but they're not then consider if you really have an honest relationship or not.

Theres just soo much to say bout this that I could keep going but I think I'm going to end with this for now. They're might be a part 2. We'll see :) if you read this then I pretty much love you!

btw, happy new year!!

A Mess of thoughts

Why is it that when we get on facebook we are quick to 'like' status' bout drama & other things but not so much about Jesus? Or when we're happy the first person we tell is our boyfriend, or our bestfriend? It's not God. One of the things I've really been working on is putting God first, in ALL circumstances. It's easy to forget about God when we think everything is going right because thats when we feel like we need don't need God. We're quick to be like "God I need you" when times are rough & when bad things happen to us/people we love but thats it. How often do we go to God first when we're happy? It just doesn't happen that way most of the time. I know I'm guilty of this too.
Its about a relationship with God & thats pretty insulting, don't you think? No one likes to be used. You don't only talk to your best friend when somethings wrong. No, you talk to them all the time & you spend time with them. God wants that too. By praying, going to church, & reading the bible is all ways that you can spend time with God. Or.. it's easy for us to be like God, help this & help that & do this & do that but all we're basically doing is telling God what we want & not that it's always bad to pray about things you want but I've learned a lot from the past that-- I don't & won't always get what I want. God has the plans for me & I'm continously learning to submit to what he would have instead of what I would have.

Well these are some of my thoughts for the day.. I might add more later or something but for now this is it.

Reasons why I follow Jesus.

1. He died on the cross for me.
2. He was beaten for me.
3. He conquered sin.
4. He conquered Satan.
5. He is perfect.
6. I love him.
7. He loves me uconditionally.
8. He keeps his promises.
9. His ways are better than mine.
10. He will never leave/forsake me.
11. He made Heaven for me to live with him.
12. He answers prayers.
13. He knows everything.
14. He is everywhere at the same time.
15. He is my Savior.
16. He was human like me.
17. He had feelings just like me.
18. He never gave into temptation.
19. He teaches me how to live.
20. He gave me the Holy Spirit to help me.
21. He protects me.
22. He outcasted demons.
23. He healed the sick.
24. He walked on water.
25. He feed the 5,000.
26. He turned water into wine.
27. He is Mighty.
28. He is powerful.
29. He created me.
30. He inspired the bible.
31. He has plans for me.
32. He never changes, he is the same everyday.
33. He saved me from my sin.
34. He forgave/forgives me.
35. If he starts a work in you, he will complete it.
36. He deserves to be worshiped.
37. He gives me strength.
38. He helps me through hard times.
39. He has changed me & is continuing to change me.
40. He is real.
41. He made everything.
42. He is simply amazing.
43. He uses everything for his glory.
44. He is better than any sin.
45. He is eternal.
46. He is holy.

I'm sure there's more but I'm gonna stop here.. (: might add more laterrr.

Lord forgive me...

I know that I have hurt God the most & this one of the 'note' pages on facebook for forgiveness so I decided that I would do this one...

HeavenlyFather,

forgive me for the times that I get preoccupied, for the times when I feel like doing things my own way & do not stop to think about what you would have me to do.
Forgive me for the times that I can't seem to love someone else. I know that you love & have created everybody but sometimes I don't see people the way you do. The times when I gossip because some people just aren't easy to love.

Forgive me when I worry because I know that I have little faith by doing so. Forgive me when I don't pray as much as I should or read my bible enough because I've found something else that I think would be better use of my time. I know that spending time with you is the most important thing though. Forgive me when I am grumpy & impatient, forgive me when I'm not a very good witness to someone else because of something I did or said. Forgive me when I procrastinate on things because I know that it doesn't glorify you.

I thank you for loving me because I know you didn't have to. I thank you for always forgiving me even though I know I don't deserve it. I thank for sending your son to die on the cross because you didn't have to that for us. We deserve to go to Hell but you loved us so much.

Music.

One of the things that I have learned over the past year is that what you listen to does matter. I use to think that music was harmless. It has a good beat so why not listen to it? If you think that way, well I did too.
As a christian I felt as if God was convicting me of this. 400 songs on my ipod & pretty much none of them were christian songs. I thought this is really wrong. How can I be a christian & not even listen to songs that lift Christ up on a regular basis? I'm not saying that ALL secular music is bad. I mean Taylor Swift is pretty awesome, I really like her music but its about being careful to what you listen to.
I started listening to Lecrae, Tedashii, & some other christian rappers & I thought wow, this is good stuff. Why should I listen to Lil wayne or Lady Gaga or whoever if I can listen to them with the same type of beats but just different lyrics. I get tired of hearing about sex, weed, and money in songs. If you're a christian & you love Jesus then why would you listen to a song that talks about how money is great & you'll do anything to get it? Or why would you listen to a song about sex when you know they're talking about it in a way that is against the way the bible talks about it ?
I don't say this because I've got it all figured out or because I'm smarter.. I say it because I struggle with it too. Music is one of the easiest things to fall into temptation with. Songs on the radio, songs in movies, and they have catchy beats. They are so easy to get stuck in your head.
Songs represent people and it seems like basic knowledge but Katy Perry use to sing christian / gospel music, but now she doesn't & theres more artists like that but now she sings.. well you know what she sings now. The point is some of her songs aren't too bad, like firework, there's nothing wrong with talking about how someone makes you feel & how they are special but from a big picture sense, I don't want to listen to that because she walked away from christian music. She'd rather sing for herself than sing about God. I have a problem with that. I'd rather listen to a song about how I have 99 problems & Jesus is going to solve them.
This is kind of a mix up of thoughts but its just something that I feel strongly about & I just thought I would share :)

If God is good, then why do people go to Hell?

I have heard people ask this for a long time & I decided that I would blog about it. Hell is a hard subject to talk about though. You may not want to believe that it is real & you may not want to believe what I'm about to say but for those who have had this question & want an answer this blog is for you.

We see from the bible that :

-Hell is a place of tornment (Luke 16:23)

-Hell contains fire that will never go out ( Mark 9:43)

-Hell is a place of intense sorrow (Matthew 13:41 & 42)

-Hell as a place of eternal punishment ( Matthew 25:46)

The first thing that we can see from the bible for a reason that people can go to Hell is because God is holy & we are not. Holiness is a part of God's character. God is perfect & he is the standard for what is right & wrong. So because God is holy, he can't have anything to do with sin. Most of you know the story of Adam & Eve, since they both took the apple & ate it we see that they could no longer be with God in the Garden of Eden. None of us are perfect. We lie to get out of things, we cheat on tests, only think of ourselves sometimes, & the list goes on. We change our minds but God never changes his. He is the same today, tomorrow, & many days after that. God is holy but he is also love. (1 John 4:16) The fact that people go to Hell might not seem fair to us but we are not holy like God is and we don't understand God or just how holy he is. So, those who refuse his salvation an eternal consequence.

God is eternal and he us for eternity. It is hard to understand but God has & always will be there. There was never a time when he didn't exist. In Ecclessiates 3:11it says that he has put eternity into our hearts. We were made to have a relationship with God, but our sinfulness gets in the way. Hell is a reality because of the fact that we are sinful.

So that doesn't exactly sound like what you want to hear? But God made a way out (John3:16) God loved us so much that he sent his son to die on a cross for us. So there is a way out. Maybe there is only one way but atleast there is a way. Because we were all sinners God could have sent us all to Hell right away because the wages of sin is death (Romans 6:23) but he didn't want that. He wanted us to be with him. Wow, do you know how amazing that is? Someone LOVES us so much that he would give up his son to die on a cross, to be beaten, have spikes go through his wrists & ankles, his legs were broken. He was in complete agony but he did that for me, & for you. The reality is that God doesn't reject people, people reject God. He could force us to worship him & allow us to get out of Hell but then he takes away our free will. Just like you want friends who want to be your friend because you are a great and worthy of being friends with God wants the same thing. He wants us to freely worship Him. He is a loving God and allows us to choose for ourselves. It is up to us whether or not we choose to accept God's free gift of salvation.

In my opinion I am so thankful that there is one way at all. God has done so much for us, why can't we worship him? because he is worthy of our praise! & God doesn't want anyone to go to Hell. I hope this helps (:

Ten Truths.

Ten Truths about me that you might not know...or you might, who knows? Depends on how well you know me (:

Truth #1 : I hate bugs.

Okay so some people can tolerate them but I just can't. I always run away from bees & wasps. My mom killed a bug for me just the other night because I didn't want to lol :(

Truth #2: I am a big procrastinator.

its something I am working on but for some reason I never feel motivated to do much of anything until the last minute. There are always those rare exceptions but most of the time I just put off everything!

Truth #3: I am addicted to four things.

1) Mountain dew. I just love it lol (:

2) Facebook. I spend wayy too muchh time on there but you probably have the same problem lol.

3) Christian Rap. Okay so if you don't know who Lecrae, Trip Lee, PRo, or Tedashii then you are missing out. They really know how to rap God's word & it really speaks to me. So if you see a post on facebook from me, its probably from one of them.

4) taking pictures. I like to remember things & the best way to remember them is through pictures. I'm not really a photographer or anything like that but I do like it. Getting cool pictures always excites me :)

Truth #4: I'm not a very good cook.

Just last night I tried to cook Patrick some eggs and what did I do? I cracked the egg outside of the skillet so it accidently went down the side of the skillet instead of in it. smh.. I need to work on this.

Truth #5: Family is SUPER important to me.

I may not always get a long with them but I don't know where I would be without them. My mom is like my backbone. She is always there to support me & give me Godly advice. My dad helps me financially & always gives me a good laugh. & my lovely sister Casey. I have already talked bout her but she really is great. I love all the rest of my family too, cousins, grandparents. I like being able to get together with them & have family time.

Truth #6: I have a big heart.

I care soo much about other people, and my feelings usually get hurt pretty easily. That part is what sucks about it, but the positive about it is that I care about people. I want to help. If you needed me at 3 in the morning, then I would be there trying to help with whatever I can. I relate to pain well, even if I haven't been through it. I wanna be able to be there for you.

Truth #7: I love Jesus with all my heart & I truly wish more people did.

Truth is, I use to think it was weird to say you loved God or Jesus. I use to think how could I really love Jesus? That's weird. But now I love him & I want to say it. I wish more people felt this way because even though being a christian isn't always easy. God is so much greater than sin. I'm not perfect though. I hate thinking about Jesus dying on the cross because it is so graphic but at the time time I love it because Jesus loved me so much!

Truth #8: Parkwood is my churchhhh :)

My friend Tyler & I came up with parkweezy haha. Don't ask, but thats our nickname for it. I love my church. I have been apart of it since I was born. It has helped me grow so much. I have a wonderful family there who support me and love me. I have great pastors who teach me the word.

Truth #9: I try to rap but I'm not very good at it.

I'm working on this, so maybe if I have a good enough rap one day you will hear it lol. But for now I just do it to be silly.

Truth #10: My favorite restaurant is O'Charleys.

They have AMAZING rolls & food. The End.

I'm already getting excited for next semester !

This is my schedule :)

Json - Pray For My City (City Lights Album) New Hip-hop Song 2010

I'm inlove with Jesus Christ & these people who write songs like this :)))

My lovely sisterrr.

I've blogged about my bestfriend & amazing boyfriend, but now I'm going to blog about my lovely sister :)
first of all, I don't know what I'd do without her. She's immature sometimes, & gets on my nerves but she's your average 13 year old. She loves animals, & children. She is very good with them I might add. She is the world's biggest book worm. She tries hard in school. I'm so proud of her. She does all kinds of things for me & she never judges me. We're pretty close for us being 5 years apart. I'm so lucky to have a sister that I can talk to & spend time with ! She has a big heart, & cares so much about other people. I know she would be there for me at 3 in the morning if I needed her.

I love you Casey !

this is how Casey feels about my raping lol, which you don't wanna hear btw.

My week overview.

Monday :

was my 19th birthday! I know, it's hard for me to believe too! So here are 4 pictures of a few gifts I got. The top 2 pictures are from Patrick. He is so sweet :) He also got me a kentucky shirt & brought me a mountain dew & some sprinkles lol. It's kind of an inside joke I guess.

The unicorn is from my best friend Melissa, I think it's cute. She also got me some vanilla body spray, & shower gel with some candy & a bunch of other little stuff. Shannon got me the book, you can always count on her to buy me good books. I haven't read it yet but it is a devotion so it will probably be prettyy good, she also got me a gift card to lifeway which will come in handy :)
Thanks you guys for buyying me gifts ! I love you all.

Tuesday :

Not the best picture but I took it as I was watching the news lol :)

Yep, we had Tornado warnings on tuesday around 11am or so. My room is in the basement anyways so I was just chilling in my bed lol. I brought my dogs downstairs with me. Nobody was home unfortunaly. I heard the sirens go off as I was upstairs. My mom was constantly calling me telling me things. If you know my mother, you know she worries a lot ! lol but gotta love her for her love & her concern that she has. Idk what you were doing but thats what I was doing. I missed my counseling class because of this storm.

Wednesday :

As usual I go to church on wednesdays. So here is the sheet from our bible study. We have started talking about Purity & how important it is. It's more than just sexual purity but also what you do with your money, what you watch, what you listen to. So if you wanna come be apart of our bible study let me know. I ALWAYS enjoy it !


I would write a bout today but it was pretty boring so yeah lol.

My Testimony.

I talked about Jesus & about church in the last post that I posted but some of you might not know exactly how I found Jesus, but if you do then I'm sorry for you reading it again.

It's not by any means dramatic but here is my story..

I've always been in church. My parents took me as a baby, and I kept going as a child but I never really understood the point of it when I was younger. I didn't know why I had to go sit & be quiet in church everyweek or why people kept bringing up Jesus. I really just didn't want to go. My parents worked every other weekend & on the weekends they worked my grandparents would stay with me. I always thought I could get away with trying to sleep in on Sunday mornings but I always ended up going to church.
As I got older & into middle school, I wasn't exactly that way anymore, but I was still pretty young & didn't really understand a lot of things a bout Jesus. I believed he was real but I didn't really have second thoughts a bout it. There was a time where I really thought I was going to go up to the pastor to tell him that I wanted to be baptised but I never did. When my sister decided to get bapisted I thought she was really young because she was only seven or so but people would shake my hand infront of church & say " don't you remember when that was you?" After that I began to feel like I really couldn't go up there because everyone at church already thought I was a christian so, what was the point ?

In middle school I was never "bad" I guess you could say. I never really got into trouble at school. People would consider me to be a good person but I knew in my heart that I wasn't right before Jesus. I wanted people to like me, & I tried to be that someone. I worried a lot about what people thought about me.

For awhile I even thought that I needed to start reading my bible more, & clean up my life before I would go to Christ but Christ saved me & he took me as I was. I could never be right with Jesus on my own, thats why he saved me. Jesus is the only one worthy enough to do that.

I was baptisted when I was fourteen, I started seeing that I really needed Jesus in my life & that I didn't want to go to hell when I died. I don't really want to go into a lot of detail about everything but it wasn't until last year or so that I realized there are a lot of things that I did that didn't really line up with what I should be doing. Sure, I looked all nice on the outside but in reality I was just another luke warm christian walking around in the church. I thought I knew Jesus but I was still doing things my way. I just wanted boyfriends so, I dated non christians who really didn't take my relationship with God anywhere. They pulled me farther from God. It wasn't like I just dated anyone but I should have waited for someone worthy enough to date & who God wanted instead of dating whoever I thought was good enough. I listened to Lil wayne rap about weed, sex, & money. I missed out on plenty of opportunities to tell people about Christ that I should have taken. I thought of myself ALOT more than I ever thought of anyone else. I became numb to Jesus for a while. I sat in church & thought this was good stuff but I became one of those Sunday christians. & you might be thinking well I wouldn't of thought that or thats not that bad or whatever, but it was sin. Sin that separates me from God, sin that hurts God, sin that hurt me & plenty of other people. I look back & think wow what were people thinking when I told them I did that because I know they weren't thinking "she's on fire for Jesus."

BUT now.. here I am completely innocent in God's eyes because of what Jesus did for me on the cross & I am so blessed to have found my personal Lord & Savior Jesus Christ. The first thing I want people to know about me is that I love Jesus & if you're my friend, you're going to hear so much about that. I want people to like me but if they don't, they don't you know ? I don't listen to secular music anymore, as lovely as Lil wayne might be, he's not Godly. It is a struggle because so many songs have great beats but they're not what I need spiritually. It's hard to find Godly movies to watch because so many movies have ungodly things in them. The first thing hollywood wants to show you is a sex scene & scripture teaches against it. I want you to understand that I will never be perfect though, I will always struggle with sin but I become more like Christ everyday. I can't date guys who aren't christians anymore, it just doesn't work. We don't have the same goals or values out of it. I get goosebumps when I hear a good sermon, & it makes me want to go shout him to the roof tops as crazy as that sounds. Coming to Christ was the best thing thats ever happened to me & I just wanted to share :)

One Sunday Morning.

Yup, I got perfect attendance for a whole year :)

Many of you know that I'm big into going to church & yes I'm proud of myself for having perfect attendance in Sunday School but I don't go for the perfect attendance or even because I think it would be a "good" thing to do, like if I get perfect attendance that would make me look better kind of thing. For those of you who don't know Sunday School is an hour each sunday morning where you get together with a group of people to study the word of God, pretty much like a bible study. It's where you interact with other people instead of listening to someone preach. The way my church does is it by having sunday school for an hour & then a sermon right afterwards.
Perfect attendance is nice but it's not my goal out of church. So with that let me tell you some reasons why I do go...

1) I like being able to worship God with other people there, sunday school is more of a discussion environment & being able to talk about the bible helps me to get more out of it because I'm talking about it instead of just listening the whole time. Don't get me wrong though, I love sermons & they speak to me helpful ways.

2) I like hearing what other people have to say about the bible, and what other people struggle with. Its encouraging to me to know that their other people who struggle with the same things.

3) The most important reason & why I do everything because I want to glorify God & praise Him for what he has done for me.

" Going to church doesn't make you a christian anymore than
standing in the garage makes you a car"

My first blog ! (:

So..I'm totally excited about making a blog because I've never made one before.

My Cutieeee :

Patrick Joseph Triplett <3

Most of you know that Patrick is now my boyfriend but lets just start out by saying that he's very much amazing ! (:I first met him when I was in 8th grade & we would talk on the phone all the time. The funny thing is that back then I thought he was annoying lol. We just started talking again & he's been a good friend to me over past few months & I have truly seen that he is such a sweet & caring person. Hes been there for me everyday & makes me feel so much better when I'm down. I'm so lucky to have someone like him!
I'm truly blessed by what God is doing in our lifes & amazed by his passion for Jesus. I'm amazed at how God has really changed his life around. I'm excited for him to come to Boyce next semester ( as soon as he gets accepted) so he can become a pastor !

"you smile, I smile"

I love you Patrick.

My best friend :

Melissa Ann Houghton <3

Ofcourse, I have to write a bout my best friend ! So many of you know her but if you don't, you should because she has been a great friend of mine for four years now ! I am so blessed to have someone there for me constantly & to lift me up. We have been through a lot together, the halls of doss, stupid relationships, & pointless drama but she's been by my side through it & I just want to say thank you to here for everything she does.

I love you Melissa !

Welll..thats all for now.