I talked about Jesus & about church in the last post that I posted but some of you might not know exactly how I found Jesus, but if you do then I'm sorry for you reading it again.
It's not by any means dramatic but here is my story..I've always been in church. My parents took me as a baby, and I kept going as a child but I never really understood the
point of it when I was younger. I didn't know why I had to go sit & be quiet in church everyweek or why people
kept bringing up Jesus. I really just
didn't want to go. My parents worked every other weekend & on the weekends they worked my grandparents would stay with me. I
always thought I could get away with trying to sleep in on Sunday mornings but I always ended up going to church.
As I got older & into middle school, I wasn't exactly that way anymore, but I was still pretty young & didn't really
understand a lot of things a bout Jesus. I believed he was real but I didn't really have
second thoughts a bout it. There was a time where I
really thought I was going to go up to the pastor to tell him that I wanted to be baptised but I never did. When my sister decided to get bapisted I thought she was really young because she was only seven or so but people would shake my hand infront of church & say " don't you remember when that was you?" After that I began to feel like I really
couldn't go up there because everyone at church already thought I was a christian so,
what was the point ?In middle school I was never "bad" I guess you could say. I never really got into trouble at school. People would consider me to be a good person but I knew in my heart that I wasn't right before Jesus. I wanted people to like me, & I tried to be that someone. I worried a lot about what people thought about me.
For awhile I even thought that I needed to start reading my bible more, & clean up my life before I would go to Christ but Christ saved me & he took me as I was. I could never be right with Jesus on my own, thats why he saved me. Jesus is the only one worthy enough to do that.
I was baptisted when I was fourteen, I started seeing that I really needed Jesus in my life & that I didn't want to go to hell when I died. I don't really want to go into a lot of detail about everything but it wasn't until last year or so that I realized there are a lot of things that I did that didn't really line up with what I should be doing. Sure, I looked all nice on the outside but in reality I was just another luke warm christian walking around in the church. I thought I knew Jesus but I was still doing things my way. I just wanted boyfriends so, I dated non christians who really didn't take my relationship with God anywhere. They pulled me farther from God. It wasn't like I just dated anyone but I should have waited for someone worthy enough to date & who God wanted instead of dating whoever I thought was good enough. I listened to Lil wayne rap about weed, sex, & money. I missed out on plenty of opportunities to tell people about Christ that I should have taken. I thought of myself ALOT more than I ever thought of anyone else. I became numb to Jesus for a while. I sat in church & thought this was good stuff but I became one of those Sunday christians. & you might be thinking well I wouldn't of thought that or thats not that bad or whatever, but it was sin. Sin that separates me from God, sin that hurts God, sin that hurt me & plenty of other people. I look back & think wow what were people thinking when I told them I did that because I know they weren't thinking "she's on fire for Jesus."
BUT now.. here I am completely innocent in God's eyes because of what Jesus did for me on the cross & I am so blessed to have found my personal Lord & Savior Jesus Christ. The first thing I want people to know about me is that I love Jesus & if you're my friend, you're going to hear so much about that. I want people to like me but if they don't, they don't you know ? I don't listen to secular music anymore, as lovely as Lil wayne might be, he's not Godly. It is a struggle because so many songs have great beats but they're not what I need spiritually. It's hard to find Godly movies to watch because so many movies have ungodly things in them. The first thing hollywood wants to show you is a sex scene & scripture teaches against it. I want you to understand that I will never be perfect though, I will always struggle with sin but I become more like Christ everyday. I can't date guys who aren't christians anymore, it just doesn't work. We don't have the same goals or values out of it. I get goosebumps when I hear a good sermon, & it makes me want to go shout him to the roof tops as crazy as that sounds. Coming to Christ was the best thing thats ever happened to me & I just wanted to share :)
